The BIG Day (Part One)

At the end of March I received a  message on facebook from an acquaintance at church.  She is friends with a lady whose son is friends with a girl who was looking to make an adoption plan for her baby.  We expressed interest & a couple of days later had the cell phone number of this girl!  After much prayer, speaking with our adoption agency & with a stomach full of butterflies I made the call.  At this point we didnt even know the girl's name!  I left a message & she called me back an hour later.

She gave us a whole bunch of information about herself, the bio dad, her situation, this pregnancy & her desires in an adoptive family.  We fit all of her criteria & she expressed a desire to meet!  We spoke a couple more times on the phone & planned to meet for lunch at Red Robin in Denver where she lives. 

That meeting was yesterday.

As you might remember we are right at the finish line of our home study.  We were asked to met with a counselor & complete a psychological profile test to make sure that we (especially me) are ready & equipped to be parents.  We took the 180 true/false question test a couple of weeks ago.  The time line & results of our home study hang on this test & what our counselor writes in her report to Hope's Promise.  We finally got the results. 

That appointment was yesterday.

BIG DAY!

10am was our appointment time.  We showed up a couple minutes early.  David being the kind, loving & amazing man that he is tried to distract me by talking about some things going on at his work.  Unfortunately, my nerves were getting the better of me & I'm not sure if I could tell you anything he was talking about.  Not being able to give David a child biologically is painful to say the least.  Not being able to give David a child through adoption because of my emotional scars from childhood...I'm not sure I could bear it.  We were called in & jumped right in to my report.  I felt really overwhelmed hearing these paragraphs of potentially harmful tenancies.  Amazingly, most everything sounded exactly like me...if you were to look at all of my weaknesses at once on a bad day.  Not what I would call fun or encouraging.  But I guess every forest contains some pretty ugly trees, yes?  As is typically the case in these situations we didn't finish up with my profile or get to touch David's.  We meet again in 2 weeks.  We were wrapping up & I couldn't take it anymore...

"So, big picture, what are your thoughts at this point in terms of our adoption process & moving forward in our home study?"  I asked.

"Oh, I believe you both will be excellent parents. I really do.  I don't see any reason not to continue.  I plan to write a letter sharing the report findings & a couple of areas I believe would be helpful for you to work through but also that you will be great parents."

HUGH sigh of relief...tears in my eyes...praises rising to the Lord who has done so much healing work in my life!  I will always wrestle with certain patterns that I learned very young in order to cope but what a huge blessing to hear such affirmation after all of the work I've done & especially God has done in my life!  This is definitely a moment to pause & boast in the incredible healing power of Jesus Christ!  2 years ago I am confident this would have been an entirely different experience!  God is good.

More to come soon!  I am writing this on my phone & can't swype anymore right now!  :)